date-a-jew-suggestions:

prismatic-bell:

date-a-jew-suggestions:

If you would report an undocumented immigrant to ICE you would have reported me to the Nazis and I don’t fucking trust you

A note:

I live in a state where you “have to” report anyone you suspect of being undocumented (that wonderful hellhole of Arizona). Now in practice this law has fallen far short, thank goodness. But if you live in such a place and they start enforcing it, here is how you get around it:

Assume everyone who doesn’t speak English is visiting.

Never ask about their job, because if they tell you they work here then you know they’re not visiting. You see them a lot for several weeks or months? Hm. Someone in the family must be ill. That’s terribly tough. They always dress in old, ratty laborers’ clothes? I feel you, my dude, I can’t afford new clothes either, and my dad has the fashion sense of an aardvark, so sometimes it’s not even about “affording” them. They say they’ve been here for years? You must have misunderstood. Spanish isn’t your first language, after all. First and last name? It never came up, or you don’t recall–you meet a lot of people.

And then, if you’re asked: no, you haven’t seen anyone residing illegally in the United States. Just people visiting.

Very good very important addition

evilyoyogang:

evilyoyogang:

Yugi takes Ancient Egyptian history for an easy ‘A’ in college and then fails because the class is wrong about everything 

Yugi: An F? But I know everything is right-“

Professor: Mr Moto your sources just say “Atem.” You can’t use your boyfriend as a source for your paper

How the heck would it be right when Atem had zero memories of any if that. No wonder he fucking failed.

Course you said collage but even so Atem was only around for like… 13 years and this missed all the rest of ancient Egypt. Also he was forgotten from the world so… Nothing he knew would even be on a test.

glyxiebear:

camben24:

4wns:

how is trump alive?? like hes rlly gone thru his whole life like That …. and no one has ever just fuckin decked him?? gave him the ole one two? knocked his lights out??? incredible

sorry to improve your day without much notice but 

NEVERMIND REBLOGGING AGAIN BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT WE ALL NEED

btrolley:

Boombox au where Lúcio is performing in Australia and Junkrat get’s caught by security selling bootleg Lúcio merch he made himself.

Lúcio thinks its so funny that he lets him go and buys a shirt off him with a crudely drawn frog and his name spelled “Loosy-oh” on it.